Musings of the day from a Two Point Someone!

Aaha! Now, that is a day which I would not mind having again. With a few modifications here and there, obviously, but that is for later. For now, it is a long, tiring, winding, grinding, happening, caffinating (err...??), drenching, drying and then again drenching (with sweat this time) kinna day. And a lot more.

First a special menion of the weather. I had heard of Mumbai having an equitable climate. The Geography Text Book of Class IV said so. So, let us define equitable first.

You get out of your house looking at the sky and it stares back it's dark little face, sullen looking and just about to cry. Alrite, without getting too philosophical, I meant, it looks cloudy, and just around the time to rain. Wear your wind cheater. Get out. The weather turns out to be cheater as well. The Sun decides to take over. Drives all the clouds away like a gardener drives the kids away from his orchard. Or his master's. Whichever, doesnt matter.

I am still in my windcheater. And I sweat hard. I chuck it in my bag, and get out of my rickshaw as well. And then, the inevitable and unenviable happens. It rains. One is drenched again. Difficult to distinguish between rain and sweat. And they say Mumbai has an equitable climate. They also say that I resemble Tom Cruise.

Today was one such day. And it began with another of those Market Research lectures. Now, I do not quite say that the lecture was too boring. But, you do get influenced by people around you who find it like wise. And so did I. Though it did have it's moments of brilliance. When the professor walked in 20 minutes late, and thus we had only 65 minutes to count down on our watches. Or is it 70? Whatever. The other moment to look forward to was when I actually gave answers to four of her questions. In return, she asked me to shut up. The first part was brilliant, the second, unnecessary. But at least it was better than the lecture next door, in which the History of Italian Civilization was getting taught as a sequel to that of the World War - II. Much better. The best part was my attendance. Three lectures. Three times present. Is it a miracle or is it a miracle?

The next portion of the day was dominated by me trying to figure out about my fee. One followed by another five digits. More than one-frikking-lakh? For what? God-only-knows. But if I am spending so much, then I better attend the lectures. And hence I decided, I will MAINTAIN A 100% ATTENDANCE in all the classes. I mean 100% required to pass. As in, 80%. Really. I can hear people saying, "Yeah, and you resemble Tom Cruise as well." I dont care. I will rise from the ashes. I will show this world my worth.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it is possible to sit for lectures, then I must. I really dont know the relevance of this statement, but I just liked it there. As you can see, I am in a bit of a goofy mood.

But getting back to the fees. Ran from pillar to post. The pillar had nothing on it. It was actually next to the pillar that I saw the place where I could pay up. Post? Well, there was no post anywhere, just that I used just to drive home a point, that it took me much more time to pay up my fee, than it takes for me to drink a cutting-chai without getting my tongue burnt.

Fee paid. Felt bad. But then I consoled myself by saying that I did not spend it gambling. Or probably smoking coke. (This reminds of a funny line, very irrelevant here, but funny all the same. It goes like this, I once tried sniffing coke, I couldnt, because the ice cubes hit my face!). So, thinking of all these positives, I moved onto my next target. A photo shoot!

Yeah, you would think that they would all be lining up to get a snap or two of a potential Tom Cruise, instead I am asked to mind the crowd. There go my two hours down the drain. And not to mention the weather. The cycle mentioned above gets repeated. Finally I get a chance to get myself clicked. It's over even before the early bird has caught the worm. (another of those irrelevant proverbs. What's with me and these today?) Back to work. And then I get that dreaded phone call.

Deepshikha tells me that the results are out. I have again managed to keep my dreams of writing a book two point someone alive. Yeah, it is a hat trick of these scores. I quickly calculate my Standard Deviation. It is very very low. Shows my consistency. Like Rahul Dravid's. The only silver lining in the sky today. Literally and figuratively.

Shubrodeep comes up with another pyramid joke. Both of us are in the same boat. A Boat called Titanic. Fortunately, it is just a boat, and not a James Cameron's set having a huge ship that sinks. More inexpensive than it. Deepshikha's quick calculations tell us that we need to come up with mathematically possible figures in our 4th trimester result to beat the three mark and stop dreaming about publishing our book. Mathematically possible. Otherwise, not. Reminds me of another line. Siddhuism. “Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than they hide”. No, not quite. Here goes another one.

"It's possible but not probable." I actually need to hit the ball for a six, I need to hit it out of the ground and then I need to hope that the umpire does not know the rules and signals it as an eight, instead of six. Will try it. You never know.

And then came evening. Met up with this junior of mine, from NMIMS as well. Coffee at Brio’s after nearly a century. Alrite, not quite a century, make that decade. But yeah, basically, Brio’s seemed both changed and unchanged. For starters, Bryan Adams was not getting played. The service was much quicker, both while serving the menu card and the bill. Not quite so while serving a choco-caramel drink. Secondly, WWF on Ten Sports still seemed their favourite serial. Thankfully, it was my junior friend who bore the brunt of the same. Not me. But it was a one hour well spent, in which I realized two things. One, I have got an year older. And two, it is not such a bad thing being a senior!

Alrite, now I am a bit tired writing this monologue. Though someone told me that monologues are normally spoken, not written. But what the hell. It is 1 in the night and too tired to even think of suitable retorts to my own “one-liners”. I could do with more of such days. At least these days. At least for a week till I stop thinking of writing a book on two point someone, and start dreaming about a three point someone. But, then will the book remain a novelty, if I do achieve three? Probably, given that people may be fooled into buying the same, thinking it is out of ten. Probably. Just probably.

Too much packed in one day. And though it was enjoyable, I am really looking forward to the peace and tranquil of Chandigarh. Soon honey...soon!

I feel like ending the way I begun. Aaha….JLT